Archive for November, 2009
Stage: Barren except a desk. A mother enters.
Mother: (to herself) I know, I’m going to dictate a letter for the machine on the desk. (there is no machine on the desk).
Mother: Dear Mark, There are a few things have been concerning me recently. Firstly, you do not have rubber nipples. Regardless of what you claim, the human being does not contain or grow polymer based plastics on a daily basis. Second, you do not run on oil. While I know that you spill oil on yourself all the time you do not in fact contain it in your veins. A liquid called blood runs in your veins and through your fleshy little nipples supplying your brain with the components necessary for thought, self-awareness. (stops for a moment)
Mother: Mark! Where have you been?
(Mark has large plastic nipples and is bleeding oil down his trousers)
Mark: I got in a fight with the other boys.
Mother: Mark you can’t do that! You’re just to sensitive for those boys. Just ignore them!
Mark: What am I supposed to do? They threw me down a stairwell and laughed when oil ran out of my ears.
Mother: Mark oil did not run out of your ears and you also do not have plastic nipples.
Mark: (feels plastic nipples) Mom, this shit is plastic just touch it.
Mother: Mark! I will do no such thing. Now go clean the blood from your ears and get ready for dinner.
Mark: Yes maam… (resigned, he marches to the bathroom off stage)
Mother: Oh! to have a son with such ideas, someone who doesn’t even know what a human is or does or how they operate!
Fragment… Angela McRibbit
Voice over: Previously on Angela McRibbit.
Shrouded Man: Angela now that you’ve secured equal rights for women in Islamic countries what are you going to?
Angela (in a pink convertible): I’m going to enter the Galvaworks 500 Desert plateau race. (car makes speed racer like noise, jettisons over a dune)
[cut to Doctor’s office]
Doctor: Angela. There’s something you need to know about Quinton.
[cut to convience store]
[Quentin McStag is kissing an old woman]
[cut to Title]
Voice Over: and now back to Angela McRibbt